Sunday, May 20, 2007
okay..exams are over..and den? nth much.. its lyk probably a huge weight being lifted off my shoulders.. and yar..much lighter now..but thats about all..
well..still can rmb vividly last week.. on saturday.. coming home from mother's day dinner.. we had it at some SRCC.. yar..at changi dat side.. and den after that we went to IKEA drink free coffee.. cool sia.. i drank tea though..it was shiok.. and so yar..after that came home at around 10 plus.. and after coming out of the lift lobby..we were making quite abit of noise lar.. and den when we got to our door.. and my mother opened the gate.. i somehow turned to the right.. and i saw this couple sitting down at the stairs.. between the 8th and the 9th floor.. dey werent doing anything.. dey jus sat dere and yar.. talked to each other.. i got a bit of a shock..and i was also wondering.. "why out of all blocks they choose our block? " and also.. "why out of all floors they choose this floor?" i got abit into the thinking mode.. and yar.. moreover i was thinking abt her.. and..yar..it jus suddenly became so evident into my mind.. tt she's still outside..not replying my smses or picking up my calls.. oh well.. okay.. jus keep this thingy in mind..
couldnt get to sleep even 2 hrs later.. probably because of the tea that i drank or smt.. or was it because i was too worried for her.. sighx.. in any case..it was already sunday early morning at around 12.30am..and i was apparently so worried for someone who still havent gotten home yet.. and kept ignoring my calls.. but i guess thats wat i get in return for wat i did.. my retribution.. so i stayed up until arnd 1.30..if im not wrong.. yup.. spent my time disturbing someone.. oh u know hu u r.. and den yar..the cordless phone was spoilt also..and so i felt so confined.. to just tat particular spot at my study room.. and so looking aimlessly out of the window.. i saw this couple.. at the roof of the public carpark that my block is facing.. they were seated on a small ledge near the staircase.. and yar.. they were making out alright.. somehow quite prominently.. although the lamps of the carpark were dimly lit.. and yar..wat u xpect me to do.. i of course look out of the window lar.. talking over the phone so sianly.. and yar..nth else better to do.. so yar..just stare at the couple lor..i believe they were around our age.. so yar..nvm.. and den jus kept looking at looking.. they were lyk kissing each other for over 5 minutes now.. and i was thinking to myself.. wa seh..hiong sia.. in public somemore.. they must be thinking tat at this hour no one will be watching.. but they are so awfully wrong.. haha!! so just kept noticing.. and soon enough.. the girl..got down frm the guy's lap.. very slowly.. and they both stood up still very slowly.. kissing still alright..mind u.. and both of them slowly fell over behind the pillar.. and i mean fell over.. down to the ground.. and tt was where i lost sight of dem.. but im kinda thankful i lost sight of them.. cos yar.. GOD knows wat they were doing.. i believe u guys can also guess lar.. and so.. yar.. this incident really made me think abt wat this world is becoming to.. wat this world will become into.. and wat this world will become eventually.. mann..
looking at all of that.. and thinking about her.. it jus really makes me cannot sleep.. and yar..not picking up my calls.. not replying my smses.. i jus couldnt feel easy.. oh well.. and arnd 1.30am.. i cldnt disturb tt person anymore.. so i jus yar..hung up lor..i laid awake on my bed.. and prayed.. until gradually and very slowly.. i fell asleep somehow..
woke up the nxt morning feeling terribly awful.. but wat to do..my life's lyk that.. and yar.. had to go to church still..hav exams the nxt day.. and wah..im lyk so slack.. but it has been one week already.. and exams are finally over.. not much of a great satisfaction as i was describing but yar..at least we can relax now.. poof...
have been really putting down alot of big things lately.. huge.. prominent things in my life.. and i all of a sudden feel so empty.. loneliness? not exactly.. emptiness? perhaps.. i don't know how to face u anymore.. i don't know how to talk to u anymore.. i don't know EVERYTHING.. abt u..regarding u.. anymore.. alright..
totally drained..
(6:43 PM)